Mark's Birth Story

For those who like to know the details...

I admit I had a hard time waiting to go into labor with this baby. I blame Esther for that--until she showed up 11 days early, I just expected my babies to come some time after their presumed due date. Mark went almost a week past his due date, the longest of any of my babies--and I had been holding my breath waiting to go into labor for two and a half weeks!

Labor was different this time around, too. With each of my other children, I had maybe 12-24 hours of very mild contractions before active labor started, they seemed to just gradually increase in intensity until I felt like I was "really" in labor. This time, I had irregular contractions starting Sunday evening, ranging from 15 to 30 minutes minutes apart--but they felt like real contractions. About 2:00 AM on Monday morning I decided to take a shower (since I wasn't sleeping) and discovered some bleeding--enough to make me concerned. We decided to go into the hospital and make sure everything was OK. A very kind neighbour came over to stay with the children. I felt silly walking into labor and delivery knowing I wasn't in active labor yet, but had a very kind nurse (Nicole) who, after verifying that baby was doing fine and the bleeding was nothing to be concerned about, sent me home with orders not to have the baby before 7:00 PM when she would be back on duty. I thought (or hoped!) baby would arrive before that...
Well, I spent the rest of the night and a good part of Monday trying to get some rest in between the contractions that kept coming about 20 minutes apart. I went for several walks, hoping to get things moving a bit faster--I felt like at the rate things were going I was going to be in labor for a week! Finally around 2:oo PM the contractions started getting closer together, and by about 3:30 I thought it was time to drop the kids off with friends and go to the hospital. I think we got to the hospital sometime around 4:00. Interestingly the hardest period of labor this time around was that half hour when we were trying to get the kids taken care of and get to the hospital--the contractions seemed harder and closer together, but maybe it was just that I couldn't focus on relaxing and dealing with them. It wasn't transition stage at all--actually, I never really experienced an intense transition with this labor. Once in the hospital I waited while they got their mandatory fetal monitor strip, then escaped to take a long shower. After the shower the nurse had me lie on my left side because the baby's heart rate was decelerating with each contraction--not only did the decels go away, but I went from about 6 cm to fully dilated within about half an hour and without any increase in discomfort--that surprised me, I had mostly been laboring in an upright position thinking that would speed things along.
That's when things got hard. My OB suggested I start pushing; I really didn't feel like pushing. I made a couple of half-hearted attempts, then waited out a few more contractions hoping the urge to push would materialize. It didn't. I tried pushing in different positions--I very much missed having a squatting bar available, as I had found one very helpful with my first two births. I found pushing much harder with this birth than with any of my others (and especially compared to Esther's water birth). The doctor assured me that the baby's head was descending just fine whenever I tried to push--but it hurt! A lot. I suppose to make up for the rest of labor being easier this time around! I tried every position I could think of. The doctor kept encouraging me to "hold my breath and count to ten"--not, generally, my favorite technique for getting a baby out but to be honest I think it's the only way I was going to get this baby out! I needed every bit of urging/encouragement I could get. I usually dislike having anyone push me to do something (my parents can attest to that characteristic from the time I was a toddler). This doctor was definitely pushing me, and my husband kept turning to me and saying "is that OK?"--he knows I don't like to be pushed. But I sensed at the time and still feel now that I had to be pushed if I was going to get that baby out.
And I did. Mark made it into the world with a slightly molded head (my other kids had not really had any noticeable molding). He was a nice purple color...didn't take his first breath for a few seconds, he was lying on my belly and the nurse was rubbing him with a towel. When he did breathe it was to start wailing and not stop--I guess the birth had not been a fun experience for him either! He pinked up very nicely, and I got to sit up and try to get him to nurse (he wasn't interested quite yet). Dad cut the umbilical cord, the doctor put a single stitch where I had a small laceration, and we all got to celebrate. There wasn't any big rush to take the baby off to examine and weigh--I felt like I had as much time as I wanted to just get to know him. When they did weigh him I was honestly shocked to see the numbers on the scale--9 lb 6.7 oz! Luke, my next-biggest baby, had been 8 lb 7 oz. Esther had weighed in at only 7 lb 1 oz. I guess I have the answer to why pushing was so much harder this time around--there was just more baby to push out! Actually, I wasn't pushing for that long--it was probably about 40 minutes between when the doctor first suggested I try pushing until the baby was born, but I wasn't really trying very hard until the last 15-20 minutes. Pushing was just so much harder/more painful than with the other babies... (note to self: put in a special request for a smaller baby next time!)

So there's the story :-) I can't complain--no complications, and an incredibly handsome little boy to join our family! I liked this hospital--it is smaller than those I have been in before, I was able to hold the baby for most of the routine evaluations, I got to give him his first bath (that is, I did my best to wash out all the gunk that was in his hair--the rest of him didn't seem to need washing)--and there were fewer post-partum interruptions, especially at night (I've never figure out how they expect a mother to rest and recover when someone is coming in every twenty minutes to take her temperature and blood pressure.) Not that I rested anyway--I seem to go into a sort of hyper-alert state for the first few days after having a baby. I can't relax, I especially can't sleep...I notice every noise, movement, etc. I figure it must be nature's way of making sure I'm aware of the new baby, but it gets rather frustrating as the sleep deprivation adds up! It's not the baby's fault, and not the hospital's fault--it's internal and doesn't go away until about 4 days after the birth.

So I was happy with the birth. Different from the others--I guess every birth is different. Oh yeah, and Nicole (my nurse from Sunday night) made it back in time to see the baby born :-)